Are you parenting a child who is always causing you trouble and making you distressed? Are you looking for a quick help on child disciplining? We have compiled this guide for you then.
Remember parents disciplining the child is a long and complex process. There’s no magic recipe and you cannot guarantee results over night. However, the results are bound to come. If parents follow a consistent strategy with faith and confidence.
Different stages of child development offer different situations for parents. Children’s cognitive and moral development happens gradually. Therefore let’s then first understand the unique traits in each age bracket.
From Birth Until 2 Years Of Age
Children at these ages are full of curiosity. They have highly receptive minds which remains fully active in absorbing the details from their surroundings. Children cover some of the main milestones of life during these years. Such as learning to speak, walk, and achieve early growth stages.
This is not just the time for their physical or cognitive development. This is also when the child starts learning discipline, manners, and social etiquette.
Parents need to be most careful in these years. As a positive mindset in early years leads to a healthy personality and habits development later in life. Whereas the shaky foundation can adversely affect the development of the child.
From Ages 3 to 5 Years
This is the time when the child gets to understand the reward mechanism. Which serves as the guiding compass for them. A sort of stimuli for their actions. Children not only learn the habits but the consequences of those as well. They start to fathom the outcome of their actions.
At these ages parents should strive to make children understand the logic behind their acceptable or unacceptable actions. Here you may also like reading A Guide On Happy Child Growth
Please note parents that kids in these ages consider elders and their loved ones as an absolute authority. They idolize them in every manner and pay attention to what’s being taught to them.
Parents should ensure that they are feeding the inquisitive and hungry minds of their kids with rationale which will only solidify their positive foundation further.
From Ages 6 to 8 Years
This is the time when you can finally start seeing the outcome of your efforts in the child’s attitude and personality. Either pleasing or worrisome. Depending on the level of concentration and intervention that was made in the preceding ages.
In this age bracket, the child has elapsed the first seven years landmark considered to be most crucial in their sub-conscious development.
As per the experts, the major portion of sub-conscious programming hits the threshold level at age of seven. The time when the child has absorbed and learned the key personality traits responsible for shaping their long-term personality.
Strategies On Disciplining Your Child
Now that we have understood how different age brackets are associated with different milestones of discipline and personality development. Let us understand some of the common strategies and tips for disciplining the child.
Parents are advised to read thoroughly. Understand, and employ in full faith for positive learning, growth and development of children.
1. Keep Them Away From Negativity
Kids at young ages have receptive minds and they notice everything they see around them. Whether it’s harnessing their development or causing negative effects on their personality.
Parents should therefore strive to create an environment conducive for their personality development. By filtering away from them outside influencers such as TV, media, even family members who have foul habits.
Parents should explore this further to understand it in detail and if needed undertake a parenting course as well for a better understanding.
2. Explain With Love And Warmth
Children do not have emotional maturity, nor they are shrewd enough to give their feelings the words and expressional sentences.
Often, it’s seen that whenever something is causing them resentment or trouble they end up showing distorted and cranky behaviors. We as parents instead of understanding the situation end up dealing with the situation harshly by telling them offs.
Parents should lovingly teach children the consequences of their actions, the rationale behind the good and bad morals. The long term effects of and pros of their right manners and discipline with patience and forbearance. And soon they will see the lilies of discipline blooming in kids personality. The key here is consistency with love and care.
3. Disciplining Your Child With Love
We don’t mean here that parents should always continue loving and affection behavior despite facing all odds. The trick here is to show strictness so that they can get in a corrective attitude. Where they will learn and pay heed to what they are being taught.
Kids have a reward centric nature. They understand anything being taught to them by elders as absolute truth and morally correct. And will refrain from disobeying, not due to any logic or rationale but only to avoid the punishment.
If children would see that their actions, misbehaving and bad manners would land them in hot water. And they will have to face some trouble they will ultimately be more open to correcting their behavior. Therefore, little punishment through words should be there to the point of making them understand and obey.
Remember parents extra harshness or physical discipline will do no good here as it might cause the following side effects in their personality.
- They will get more defiant and rebellious. They will hold negative perceptions in their mind of their loved ones including parents and will consider them their enemies. This is perhaps the last thing we would want to see.
- With often harshness and rough attitude from parents, a rift will create between them and children and they will shy away in sharing their stories, experiences, and needs with parents. This is perhaps the greatest loss for kids as well as parents as it will result in further problems and complications.
- Lastly, parents might not realise the long-term effects that their actions can create in children’s personality. Long-term mental stress and fear will make a dent in kid’s self-esteem, confidence, and cognitive abilities, their decision power, and mental strength suffer, and such effects are often visible when kids reach higher ages.
4. Be A Role Model For Disciplining Your Child
If you are the kind of person who throws up their shoes in opposite directions after coming home, keeps the wardrobe unorganised, and has things messed up everywhere, then don’t expect your kid to be any different nor be surprised when you find them replicating the same behaviour.
As we mentioned above the kids have inquisitive as well as receptive minds they learn from their surroundings and the first example they witness right after opening their eyes are their immediate family members and parents.
You already know that children consider elders and parents as an absolute authority who are immediate role models for them.
The footsteps that you will leave in front of them, they are bound to follow the same path. So next time in your endeavors of upbringing a disciplined child make sure that you are yourself living up to the expectations.
5. Keep Expectations Real
Don’t you think we all sometimes misbehaved in our childhood, we often used to be the source of nuisance for our parents and yes. We did end up getting put in the corner for some time out? Well, it’s a natural process and kids irrespective of their demographics follow the same curve of learning growth and development.
We would advise parents not to be too critical of their kids’ habits and little acts. Obviously, we don’t mean to say that parents should turn a blind eye on everything but give them enough room where they can bring out their creativity and brilliance in an effective manner.
6. Disciplining Your Child With Meaningful Stories
Remember the bedtime stories and other short moral based stories that our parents or grandparent used to read out to us? Didn’t we use to love those and idealise the characters? Well much has changed since then, media and entertainment have progressed a lot, our leisure hours have also shrunken, but child psychology is still the same as ever.
Parents these days should strive to take some healthy time out in which they should be able to give some healthy entertainment to kids.
With the advancements now, more ways can be harnessed for kids’ positive growth and development. Parents may designate time for a good movie, TV show, or documentary which will enable children to learn with fun.
Final Word On Disciplining Your Child
Remember parents disciplining the kids is a time taking and tedious process which requires patience, love and empathy. Your strategic actions coupled with empathy are sure to produce beautiful and everlasting results in your kids’ personalities. Here you should also consider reading A Guide On Ethics In Children
We hope that this guide will help you in understanding the subject in a better way.